Wednesday, January 28, 2009

What can happen next?

Well, just got off the phone with my doctor and he is telling me the hardest thing to do as a mother. He is telling me to have no contact with my daughter. I really don't know what I am going to do with this last bit of information. Tim doesn't even no about this happening. All of the voices have not been there since Monday, but now the doctor says I have severe hatred or resentment towards several people. That may be the beginning of the voices. Glad I haven't had to deal with the voices and not being able to see Mya at all. Please offer suggestions of what I can do about this.
She is pulling up all on her own and even letting go for a few seconds! I don't want to lose out on her first steps, but do I go against the doctors word to see my daughter? I don't get it!

Love Ya

Sunday, January 25, 2009

More pictures!








Who knew that these three pictures are all the same baby? Her personality has really come out now that she is crawling all over the place. She now says please and thank you. Just this morning she said "girl friend" like she was one of the crew. We will get she wait and measures in another month. Now I have to tell you that with the medicine that I am on I might as well be pregnant all over again. I am 17 pounds away from my heaviest with Mya. I hope that we fitness will help with this. I am on a strict protein diet that works with my brain...Well, enjoy the pictures!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Here is the pictures so stop bugging!!!







Just making some bread with Grammpa Mike from Kansas. Lots of fun this the dishes all the time. The more noise the better! I know you don't care much now what is up with us because the pictures are there so there they are!!!!!!!

Love Ya!

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

December to Forget...

THis blog will have no pictures, but it will have a lot of information. December was meant to be very good with coming home from Thanksgiving and a very interactive Christmas this year. Instead there were several times that I cannot remember one thing for several days. These episodes really scared Tim and I and it brought me to my first stay in the hospital. I was in the hospital for several days and not wanting to be there at all. Tim was only allowed to visit one hour of the day and the days were very long.(well still 24 hours). In getting out there was a chance that Tim and I would meet with a counselor that has a 3-5 yr. waiting list. We were only back in Colby a few days when it got worse. I was on many medications and hearing lots of voices. We had a second session with the same counselor and it was going okay, but then everything plummited from there. I was "sick" and in ICU for a couple of days...then back to the hospital. When we got home I was leaving for good then the police got involved. I "went to camp" over night then back to the hospital. I missed Christmas and New Years with my family. We finished Christmas on the 5th of January and soon will be a adult date for New Years. A little late but not forgotten. Thank you for everyone who has stuck with me through my trash...We have really known where are true friends are...so sad...
The ultimate diagnosis is bipolar disorder, post tramatic stress disorder and seizures! WOW!!!
Next blog I promise to put pictures up!

Love Ya! Becky